"Prepared Childbirth"

Apparently I was on hiatus last week. I really didn't have anything to report. I took the entire week off from running and ate approximately 6 lbs. of peanut M&Ms. I can only think that all the candy I eat will make Val sweeter. On Friday night, Sweet LJ and I went with cousins to see Santaland Diaries. Funny show! If you don't plan to travel to Atlanta to see the play, you should read it, and then read all the other David Sedaris books.

On Saturday Sweet LJ and I went to a class offered by our hospital called "Prepared Childbirth." We could've gone for like 4 Thursdays for 2 hours each night, but we opted for the day-long, one-shot that lasted from 9 AM - 4 PM. (It was supposed to last until 5 PM, but I guess you can only be so prepared.)

Nurse Tory led the class, which consisted of a few childbirth videos, a tour of the labor and delivery parts of the hospital, Nurse Tory telling us how things will really be, and massage techniques our coaches should use on us while we're in labor. Our hospital is in midtown, and I thought my classmates would be much funnier than they were, given our urban location. They were pretty normal, but there still were a few entertaining moments:

• The guy who asked how long it would take "her stomach to be flat again"
  
• The guy who asked whether the nurses "would take care of it" or was he responsible for cleaning up the lochia. I guess he was hoping Nurse Tory would go home with them after the birth.
  
• Nurse Tory telling us that stage two contractions would "give us the business"
• The guy who texted through about 50% of the class

My husband did not text during the class or ask when my stomach was going to be flat again, because he knows better. He probably wanted to know whether my snoring will stop once the baby is born, but he didn't ask that, either. I do feel more prepared; mainly because I've seen where everything will happen. I remain calm when I think about the birth process and curious as to how everything will go.